Mirror – (Sonnet)

Mirror

Bevelled edge of leafy flowers and vines
a keepsake that I hang upon my wall.
This mirror that I see before me shines;
it seems the years were minutes after all.
Sweetest face you are never far from me,
memories like a favourite food each day
and in my heart I know I’ll ever see
the way you always helped me find my way.
And now that time has passed and you are gone
I see a person looking back at me,
she’s older wiser and a little drawn
and though I know it’s me who I can see
you’re looking back and smiling at the grey
and in this glass it’s you I see each day.

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68 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. leamuse
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 11:25:36

    Oh Christine! This is so powerful yet tender at the same time. I literally have goose-bumps!
    You are light years ahead of me as I never tried to write a sonnet. 🙂 xxx

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 11:49:39

      Thank you Lea.This is my very first attempt! I was prompted by the task set last time at my writing group. We were given the subject of a mirror and to say what it was like, where was it etc. So I decided to try it in sonnet form! Thank you for this lovely comment!

      Love xxx

      Reply

      • leamuse
        Jun 02, 2014 @ 12:19:33

        I’m impressed. I have never tried to write a sonnet and yours was so wonderful!

        I do miss having a writing group. Perhaps one day I will find another interested soul or two…

        Love xxx

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 12:26:55

      Well I just find it keeps me inspired to write, even if I dont write on the subject of the week, which I often don’t! So James, our tutor was quite impressed that Id covered everything this time! He didnt request a sonnet but he writes so many and I have a book of his with 63 sonnets in so I thought here goes Im going to try one!!😊

      Reply

  2. Libby
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 11:26:56

    This is lovely Christine. I have never yet managed a decent sonnet so I am in awe!

    Reply

  3. Jackie
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 11:32:27

    Beautiful! xx

    Reply

  4. climbingdownhill
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 11:42:58

    Whoa…I have to just sit and let this soak in.

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 11:46:28

      The person looking back at me is my mum 🙂

      Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 12:03:43

      Thank you! Ive wanted to try a sonnet for ages but never dared and didnt think I could. But Im being encouraged to try things and take risks at the writing group I started going to each week about six months ago. Its good for me and Im enjoying it! I told my tutor he is helping me to keep feeling alive; I can so easily feel drowned in all the horrible MS related stuff.

      Reply

  5. Cynthia Jobin
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 12:36:04

    By George you’ve done it! (as I knew you could and would). And it’s a good one, Christine. Not only do you have the rhyme scheme, but your meter is smooth,and best of all, you’ve said something worthwhile and very moving! Bravo! bravissimo! (I was so excited to see this, this morning, my dog was giving me funny looks because I was telling you out loud how pleased I was to see your sonnet) Sending you a great big hug! 😉

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 13:12:15

      Oh Cynthia thank you! You have honestly made my day. To receive a comment like this from a poet I look up to is just the best thing! Im going to keep this and refer to it when I decide to wear my dark cloak of self doubt. Thank you again. And a big hug back!

      Reply

  6. lscotthoughts
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 14:52:57

    Oh, Chris, this is absolutely wonderful! I love the subject and the perfect ending, too. I haven’t written a sonnet, either! My brain hasn’t been able to wrap up all the rules in one package, but it’s on my “bucket list” for this year (heehee) and now I have you as a mentor! 🙂 Lovely work, my friend! HBL ♥

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 16:20:13

      Thanks very much Lauren! Ive been scared to try any poetry forms, but suddenly I decided to have a go at a aonnet. Ive heard quite a bit about them ad the tutor in my writing class writes a lot of sonnets and I bought one of his collections recently and became fascinated with them! ❤️ Xx

      Reply

      • lscotthoughts
        Jun 02, 2014 @ 16:23:44

        That’s wonderful that you had some mentoring from your tutor and then to read his sonnets is a good teaching tool, too! I’ll have to try something like that…just start reading and studying them..♥ xo

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 16:26:37

      Its daring to start I think. That’s the biggest part. I found I actually enjoyed writing this; I thought Id hate it! 😊 xx

      Reply

      • lscotthoughts
        Jun 02, 2014 @ 16:38:37

        I know, it is. They just seem daunting and difficult! 😉 But I will try and you have inspired me, Chris, so thank you! You did a wonderful job and if this is your first sonnet, wow! Amazing! ♥

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 02, 2014 @ 17:23:24

      Thanks again Lauren! ❤️ xx

      Reply

  7. Cynthia Jobin
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 16:45:35

    I came back here intending to ask you if the sonnet-writing was all misery, or if there was something satisfying about it, but I see you’ve mentioned above that you actually enjoyed it…great!

    Reply

  8. Harry
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 18:58:23

    Well done Christine its lovely.

    Reply

  9. Minuscule Moments
    Jun 02, 2014 @ 20:59:43

    Christine I love the sonnet and I love this sentence in particular…..it seems the years were minutes after all. I had a conversation with my youngest as we cannot believe we are half way through this year already and I am turning fifty in oct, so yes it does seem like this for me too. I admire anyone who can write good poetry it is not easy to do. You have such a special talent.

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 03, 2014 @ 08:42:46

      Thank you so much Kath for this lovely warm comment. The years do seem like minutes, My youngest daughter came as a surprise when our others were in the teen years and I felt old to be having another baby. Now she is 27 and I have no idea where its all gone. Im savouring every moment from now on. 😊
      Love and blessings

      Reply

  10. Wendy Macdonald
    Jun 03, 2014 @ 04:21:23

    Christine, you shine in this sonnet. The same line that touched Kath also touched me. My mom is aways telling me how fast time has gone. Her mother told her the same thing. I’m already telling my daughter this… (I like your gravatar picture too.)

    Blessings ~ Wendy ❀

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 03, 2014 @ 08:46:33

      Thank you very much Wendy. I dont think we listen really when we are younger, we’re too busy getting on with life and we probably arent all that good at listening when we are older, well at least Im not. But I am aware, since my diagnosis, of the fragility of life and have started savouring every moment, even the difficult ones as they are there for a reason too I think.

      Blessings to you too. 😊

      Reply

  11. harulawordsthatserve
    Jun 03, 2014 @ 05:13:12

    Wow Christine, such a beautiful sonnet! You’re so inspiring! You make me want to write one, and join a writing group and…:-) And I just LOVED that line (as others have mentioned) – it seems the years were minutes after all. I love sonnets, I think the form brings out a lyricism and music that gives permission to a daring playfulness and power in the words we choose. Great job Christine, I hope you’ll write more and share them with us! Love, Harula xxx

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 03, 2014 @ 08:52:35

      Thank you so much Harula! I actually really enjoyed the process in writing this. I thought it would be difficult and not enjoyable, but maybe the subject had something to do with why I enjoyed it. I hope to write more, I have got the urge now that Ive done one! And youre right, this form does evoke a lyricism and music. After Id finished it I found myself starting to read all poems as sonnets, then realusing they werent. I think Ive started thinking in sonnets, thats how powerful it was once Id introduced myself to the form! 😄😄 xx

      Reply

  12. triciabertram
    Jun 03, 2014 @ 10:56:59

    Christine, I just keep rereading this. What a beautiful, lyrical, sonnet. And the heart of it, such heart. It tells a wonderful story in so few lines.
    You never cease to amaze me the way you set your mind to something then master it. You rock my friend. ❤ xx

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 03, 2014 @ 11:03:49

      Thank you so much Tricia! I enjoyed writing it and never imagined I would ever be able to write one! I have the urge now to try more! Lots of love to you at superspeed across the world! ❤️ Xx

      Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 15, 2014 @ 09:04:48

      Haha! I love to give you cause for a bit of a snigger Tricia! And you are sp right, Tom is a real gem; when he comments he really does and he is so encouraging and supportive. I believe he is a very good poet and writes all sorts of different complicated forms. Ive been saying to him for ever and a day that I would never be able to write a sonnet! So Im dead chuffed as we say here.

      It was line 11 that was missing and I dont know now I missed it! It was right there in my draft and I just left it out; I cant really see how I did this because it doesnt sound right without it. Anyway the line is “she’s older, wiser and a little drawn”. It sounds much better now!

      I sent an email to a friend in my writing group to tell her, and I put as the subject of the email “my sonnet has a line missing!” She suggested this could be the title of a funny poem! 😄😄. As “they” say, “Watch this space” 😊❤️ xxx

      Reply

  13. Jane Thorne
    Jun 03, 2014 @ 21:16:08

    A beautiful sonnet my lovely friend. Your mirror reflects your beautiful light and that is backlit by love. For it is not the actual reflection that we all see, but the light of your love that shines so brightly. ❤ xXx

    Reply

  14. gonecyclingagain
    Jun 04, 2014 @ 11:20:11

    Outstanding. Very, very well done – I knew you had it in you. It’s structurally perfect you got the volta in at line 9! – and the metre is spot-on. I hope it wasn’t too painful to write: it certainly doesn’t read as though it was. And I hope even more that this is just the first of many. A really top-notch job. N.xx

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 04, 2014 @ 12:13:32

      Thank you Nick! This is such an encouraging comment for me. It felt impossible at first and then once Id started it I actually found myself enjoying the process. After working on it for quite a while I found myself expecting everyrhing I read to be in sonnet form!! Thank you for your encouragement x

      Reply

  15. SuzyHazelwood
    Jun 06, 2014 @ 13:54:03

    Really excellent sonnet Christine!!! Are you distantly related to Shakespeare maybe! 😀 I like the way you tell of that curious moment that happens to most of us, we see people we once knew within ourselves – it happens to us all at some point. I’ve noticed looking in the mirror recently, I could swear I’m starting to see my mother staring back – it’s a strange feeling sometimes. And I think my behaviour is beginning to match the looks – I’m so grateful my mother was a very sane and sensible woman! 😉

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 06, 2014 @ 14:51:41

      Thank you Suzy! Yes it’s my mother I see in this mirror. And just as you say I think Im starting to behave like her too! My grown up children can often be heard saying to me ” you sound just like nana”! Not too bad a thing, she was lovely. People have asked if it was painful writing a sonnet – my answer was no, I enjoyed it and have the urge to write another one! 😊 x

      Reply

  16. bardessdmdenton
    Jun 06, 2014 @ 18:36:30

    Just beautiful, Christine. I love where the prompt too you … and your wordplay. The opening lines are so lovely and the whole poem flows like clear cleansing water. A first sonnet extrememly well done! XO ♥

    Reply

  17. Starralee
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 06:13:14

    Fabulous Sonnet–Well Done!

    Reply

  18. Angela
    Jun 10, 2014 @ 22:47:03

    Oh, well done, Christine!! You have achieved something that has had me tearing up my pages – a sonnet! And it is beautiful to boot! It reads so smoothly and has great meaning, I love it. Well done, my friend!! xoxo

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 11, 2014 @ 09:13:04

      Thank you so much Angela for this lovely supportive comment. I have been wanting to try one for quite some time but no inspiration came at all. Then when our tutor at my writing class asked us to write a poem about a mirror I decided to go for it! Im not often too pleasd with what I write but I was peased with this one. 😊 love and hugs xxx

      Reply

  19. Peter Wells aka Countingducks
    Jun 11, 2014 @ 09:35:45

    I don’t know what has gone wrong, but how can I have missed this beautiful and touching verse. Its so rich insight and acceptance that it has enriched my day

    Reply

  20. Thomas Davis
    Jun 14, 2014 @ 12:04:15

    Oh, I am coming so late to the commendation party, Christine, but I tell you, you’ve discovered the power of poetic craft, and that has led to what it often leads to: A true sonnet with memorable lines and a meaning that does not say, but penetrates beneath the surface of the poem to sing alive the world in which you are living. Traditional poetry is not widely trumpeted today, of course, and much of the poetry written is memorable, but those who dare the poetic craft often find a voice that is more powerful than the voice they have found in free verse. Following the rules of a traditional form can be intimidating, I suppose, but what the process does is force the poet to work on every line, trying to find sense as that works against meter and to make sure syntax is not tortured to make language that fits either meter or rhyme. There is also the sing-song challenge, making sure the rhyming is not only natural and appropriate, but also does not distract from the poem. Too many poets have, in the past, written awful poetry by emphasizing rhyme in a simplistic fashion, ruining the music they are trying to make by not emphasizing what, to their ear, is music at the expense of the poem’s other poetic qualities.
    You have come a long way as a poet, Christine. You have come from a place where you are writing “poems as therapy for the MS and also because sometimes it is simply fun to do,” to the craft of a serious poet who is trying to fashion a memorable music that strikes meaning into all of our humanity. I, for one, coming late to the party, celebrate your growth and your courage as you begin to master language and bend it to true poetry.
    The comments above give you a clear idea of just how good this sonnet is. I don’t think I need to repeat what they say. Nick Moore, a master of the sonnet if there has ever been one in the English language, says, “A really top-notch job,” and it is. As Nick says the meter and rhyming is well done, and even the volta has an appropriateness that is admirable. You seem to be missing one line (I count only 13 rather than 14 lines), but the strength of this effort lies in its unity of language, mood, and meaning, the memory of an unnamed person, “Sweetest face you are never far from me,” who is gone reflected in the mirror you look into, their life reflected in your life. Congratulations. It is a wonderful effort.

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 14, 2014 @ 14:06:34

      Tom thank you so much for this supportive and encouraging comment! It really urges me on. But (and please excuse my language) shit!!! Thank you for pointing out the thirteen lines! I must have been so excited that I overlooked this. Ive just checked my draft which definitely had the full fourteen lines and have edited the poem. Maybe you would read it again for me. 😊

      Reply

      • triciabertram
        Jun 15, 2014 @ 00:39:28

        I didn’t count the lines first time around, but I just did then and it’s now 14. I wish I had a copy of the original to see how you reworked it. It’s wonderful, Christine. And what an amazingly detailed, constructive critique from Thomas. The man is a gem. So are you my precious friend. ❤ xx
        (I sniggered when you wrote shit coz I'm never growing up – attagirl.)

      • Thomas Davis
        Jun 19, 2014 @ 23:14:50

        Yep, 14 lines now. This is really good work, Christine. Absolutely first rate.

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 20, 2014 @ 12:19:36

      Thank you Tom. Of course, it reads much better now. And rhanks for all your encouragement.

      Reply

  21. beckarooney
    Jun 15, 2014 @ 17:37:40

    This is a wonderfully expressive, tenderly written poem Christine. I can’t believe it is a sonnet, it flows so effortlessly I wouldn’t have realised if you hadn’t written it in the title. Beautiful! 🙂 xx

    Reply

  22. Through My Eyes
    Jun 16, 2014 @ 12:46:18

    Oh my what can I say! I love this sonnet Christine and this is definitely one we can all relate to. Beautifully written xxx

    Reply

  23. hollyannegetspoetic
    Jun 16, 2014 @ 22:55:16

    Sonnet-writing scares the wotsit out of me (you ask Polly about my aversion to writing to a “form! lol) so I was impressed even before I started reading – and then even more so after. Fab. 🙂

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 17, 2014 @ 10:38:17

      Thanks very much Holly. It was actually James who spurred me on. He gave us an exercise the other week to write about a mirror. We had three points to follow and to include in the poem (or piece of prose). Simultaneously I had bought his book of 63 sonnets. So I thought sod it I’ll have a go! Ive not particularly had an aversion to form, Ive simply been terrified of it!! 😄 x

      Reply

  24. kathryningrid
    Jun 18, 2014 @ 17:35:17

    Such a beautiful love poem, a great tribute to *any* who have gone before us and given us strength and wisdom and hope through their love. I hadn’t ever tried sonnets until the last couple of years, and discovered I really enjoy working in the form, even if imperfectly. You knocked this one out amazingly on your first try! Hurray for you!!!
    🙂
    xoxo,
    Kathryn

    Reply

    • journeyintopoetry
      Jun 19, 2014 @ 09:27:12

      Thank you very much Kathryn! I have, thus far, in my poetey journey, been afraid of form of any kind! But I just made the decision to go for it and my writing class futor loves sonnets and Ive just bought his book of 63 Sonnets. Now Im finding it hard to think in any other way! 😄

      Reply

  25. kathryningrid
    Jun 19, 2014 @ 17:41:01

    PS—I keep forgetting to tell you how wonderful your new photo is! Beautiful! 😀
    xo

    Reply

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